Just when I thought Jake the Bachelor has questionable sense of women, he impressed me by sending the exact two girls I was rooting for to go home, home. Bravo, Mr Pilot.

Although I am very delighted with what hope Ryan and Trista Sutter bring to Hollywood and “reality romance”, I am neither a fan of The Bachelor nor of The Bachelorette. I only started watching it because Eli wants to watch it. I don’t know if it is the jealousy of hot bods or just plain disgust at how insulting those girls are as a reflection of young women looking for love. It is very difficult for me to watch a herd of “typical” girls make a fool of themselves on international television, and television creating a dreamlike effect around an American boy. I’m just turned off by the show. But I watch it anyway. Life is full of contradictions and oxymorons.

Nonetheless, there are some lessons to learn from such shows. The obvious ones being: which gown is nice and which isn’t. What bachelors are looking for. Exactly how catty girls can get. How much girls like gossip. How hurtful, deceitful and sly women can be…

The previous episodes had Jake making it very clear that girls who “intrigue” him get to stay. Unfortunately for Miss Yayapapaya (translation: snob), aka Miss Elizabeth from Nebraska, she didn’t know what made guys stay. Not seduction, no games, just honesty and genuine interest.

I mean, do girls really think guys allow their lives to be ruled by physical needs and attraction? Was Miss Yayapapaya trying to save ‘face’ by refuting Jake’s suggestion that she was constantly teasing him? Or was she so oblivious and/or unable to differentiate ‘flirting’ from ‘teasing’? Did she not know where to draw the line?

I don’t mix around a lot with friends of such ‘calibre’. As a matter of fact, I can’t think of any friend who behaves that way because I don’t pretend to be friends with people I do not like.

Lesson here: Lure the man by intriguing him with your personality and your life’s experience. You can’t lure a man by in the words of Jake, “dangling a carrot” because he will lose interest – fast.

I took Eli’s hand and did a fist pump  when Jake eliminated Miss Yayapapaya from the show. Jake’s decision helps me not struggle so much with sitting down, stuffing my face with party mix and watching The Bachelor.

Episode Three also provided Eli and I a good discussion point:

Vienna apologizes to the girls for being such a self-obsessed kiss-and-tell b*tch. Most of them responded with a “Thank You” they did not mean. Gia gave Vienna a hug. Ali was the only one who was honest enough to speak up for herself. She questioned Vienna for calling all the rest of them “fake”, which Vienna did in her confrontation with the girls. Vienna denies calling them fake and cooks up some senseless claims.

Eli asked me which girl’s style do I prefer: Gia or Ali.

I chose Ali simply because she was honest with how she felt and not simply pretend to accept.

Some months back, Eli said some things that upset me. A while later, he took me in his arms, explained and tried to apologize. Tried – because I was not a gracious receiver and unwittingly “milked” his apology.

Although Ali and Vienna’s confrontation is quite different from Eli’s and mine, it reminded me of the above incident because I was “Ali”, the one who wouldn’t just shut up and accept the apology graciously.

Watching The Bachelor with Eli presented an opportunity for us to discuss this again and for me to apologize to him for being the piece of work that I am.