A recent survey of college-age persons found that men were more likely to include their girlfriend in their Facebook profile photos than vice versa. The survey also revealed the double standards held by women who gave higher importance to the male partners indicating they are “in a relationship” than indicating they themselves are in one. Apparently, people also fight over this relationship status thing.
How accurate is the survey?
Coincidentally, Eli and I were discussing our Facebook relationship status last night. I asked my groom: “How will we update our relationship status (immediately after exchanging our wedding vows) without my 24/7 mobile 3G connection? We have to make it official.” He teased me about how important it is to me, and then I reminded him that it wasn’t I who updated our Facebook relationship statuses. It was him. And I have all the Facebook email notifications to prove it!
I was in college when I met Eli. Both of us have our individual Facebook accounts but neither are avid users. Eli logs on only when there is a compelling reason to do so. His profile photo, which features the both of us, hasn’t changed in yonks. He said the next photo would be that of our wedding photo (awwww!). My current profile photo is well, a photo of myself Eli took a year ago – because I think I look good in it. I don’t have a Facebook wall and all my tags are not visible to anyone.
Neither of us had our “relationship status” information visible on our profiles. If memory serves me right, we must have been courting for two months before I received a notification that Eli has informed Facebook he is in a relationship with me, and I should confirm that. We were both in our respective homes and texting on our BlackBerry. I remember calling him up and asking him what is that about.
Prior to meeting Eli, I was adamant about disclosing relationship status on Facebook. While I enjoyed finding out who is with whom and who has broken up with whom, I did not like being on the other side. But I get it.
Girls, I get that you want all your friends to know you’ve snagged a hottie. You want them to envy you. You want all his friends, particularly female friends, to know that he is “off the market”, so you want him to make the declaration. You want him to disclose that he is “in a relationship”.
At the same time, some girls might be hesitant to disclose their relationship status because they are either still holding out and don’t want potential guys to bow out just yet, or they aren’t proud of who they’ve got. I think more commonly, the former. After all, I’ve met my fair share of girls who think their dudes are handsome when I’m like, “Seriously? That guy? Ummm. Sure, if that flat round nose, slitty eyes and muffin-top gets you off. Okay, well done you.”
Whereas, guys will post photos of their hot girlfriends. They too want to show off to their guy friends that they’ve snagged a hottie. And the boys, they do not worry about closing off potential girls because they know that the girls will continue to offer themselves. It is the truth of the matter.
The gentleman will back off when he is made aware that the lady is spoken for. Whereas the women will launch multiple attempts at getting the man, even if he is married. FACT. We are competitive like that.
Personally, I’ll shout it out to the world that I belong to Eli. Hello, this entire website is a shrine to my beloved. He’s the most beautiful person I’ve ever known. So gorgeous, so generous and so loving. I was thrilled when he changed his relationship status to “In a relationship with Carine”, and updated it to “Engaged to Carine”.
I remember I was sitting next to my mother, when the Facebook notification came it. I slipped off the couch with glee and excitement, dropping my BlackBerry in the process, as I reached for my laptop to confirm that Yes! He did get on one bended knee and asked me if I was willing to spend eternity with him!
It felt so good that he was the one initiating the relationship statuses. It shows me how proud he is of us.