“Where are all the good men?” This is a common question amongst single ladies, from teenagers to women at their prime.
I know I’ve always lamented, “There are no more good men left!” And always heartily agree that all the good men are either married or gay.
Mother used to tell me I need not be in such a hurry to find a mate while I’m in school. Wait till I join the workforce, that is where the eligible men are. But Mother, all my male friends are hooking up while they are in school, how would there be any eligible men left for me in the workforce? Many are ready to marry their university girlfriends as soon as they receive their first paycheque!
Needless to say, I didn’t heed my mother’s advice. Crushes and infatuations went further than distant “admiration”. I crashed and burnt by the time I was 19. Although I continued dating, even some of my closest male friends, there was no longer emotional connection that went more than just friends. Groundless hopes and expectations led to further burn and eventually scared me off boys for good. I started planning my single life of mini coopers, 64-feet wide bungalow and a faithful Labrador Retriever. (Coincidentally, today is Lucky’s Birthday.)
But it never stopped me from wondering where all the eligible young men were.
My sister would always ask couples how they met because she was curious as to where people met people. I just kept wondering.
Tonight I found just the place.
Eli and I had stumbled into a sports bar where we had overpriced burger and steak; both of which did not taste good, much less justify their prices and claims of having really good steak. Prior to settling down in a dwarfing booth, we had wandered around the pub and I couldn’t help but notice the grossly disproportionate number of male to female ratio. 10:1. No exaggeration. There were single men everywhere! No rings, no chicks hanging off their neck and no sleazy business going on. Just fine young men having a good time with their pals on a Friday night.
Some were hitting balls at the virtual golf course, some at the high tables with another friend, and many others sitting at tables with a group of friends, sipping beer and not being rowdy. They looked like pretty decent young men. Some really quite pretty. I was checking them out as part of my research okay! I was in the company of my perfect prince charming, who was helping me understand what these good boys were doing alone.
“What are the chances that these men are single?” I asked Eli.
“They most possible are,” replied Eli, “It’s a Friday night and here they are hanging out with guys.”
I trust Eli should know, considering he was once upon a time a swinging single man hanging out with his best friend in the many bars in Montreal! Ahem.
My next question was of course, “Where Are The Girls?!”
My lady friends are always lamenting, finger-twisting and asking the century old question of where all the good men are. I was an active member of that discussion myself, before Eli was sent from heaven to be my partner.
Okay, so these guys are at a sports bar, swinging golf clubs at a virtual green instead of grinding with some chick in dimly lit arenas. This doesn’t mean they are more interested in sports than they are in women! This just means these guys are not into sexual teasing as much as they are into clean business!
The chances of getting a good guy in a non-sexual environment is much higher. Yes, sports does send crazy endorphins and incite raging male hormones. However, keep in mind that this raging hormone is one driven by true heart – the heart that would love, cherish and protect his lady.
So my dear friends, perhaps the next Friday night outing should be your neighbourhood pub. Dress casual because, don’t you know? The sloppier you look, the higher the chances of bumping into the only one who makes your heart skip many beats.